Celebrating You: Strong women who are moms and wives

It’s always a special moment when I get to learn motherly things from women who I admire and children who I adore.

I was mistaken for a mom of a high school senior a few weeks ago. I had taken two of our students on a college visit, and the professor assumed I was mom. And after I cried for a minute wondering if I looked old enough to have an 18 year old child, I then began to laugh about it. I told my “daughter” that I wouldn’t be able to afford this college on my church salary, and we’d have to talk to her father about paying for this. She called me mom and we had a good laugh. But I did feel a sense of pride and responsibility for these two students who I’ve seen grow in incredible ways in the past several years. I’m sad to see them graduate soon and starting a new chapter of life. I feel a sense of hope that I’ve taught them what God would have wanted me to. I suppose mothers always have hope that they are teaching their children good morals and values.

One of my former students (Kendra) is at college about an hour away. Kendra’s been having a rough transition into college and I went to pick her up for a weekend away. It was great reconnecting with her. She was a huge help for our lock in. Kendra babysat for several families while she was a student in our ministry and one of the girls wanted to go with us as we drove her back to school. So Jorie and I took Kendra back on Monday morning. As we dropped her off I couldn’t help but feel what a mom feels when leaving them in their dorm to face the world at school. We said goodbye quickly as I could sense the tears coming for both of us. It was that sense of happiness as she is learning to do life on her own and at the same time sadness that we were leaving her there alone. There’s nothing more that a mother wants than to protect her child from sadness, fear, and loneliness. I pray that Kendra finds her niche. I know she will.

Jorie and I continued our trek back home, stopping at Chick-Fil-A (of course). I indulged her request for a milkshake, making note that she had to share it with me. She agreed and we sat outside to eat, and talk. On the way home she talked non-stop. It was great. I just listened. And asked questions. And for a moment, I realized these are the times that moms love, getting a chance to just listen to the random thoughts and stories that children have. Jorie doesn’t talk much, so this was a huge gift. And I was thankful.

I am not a mom. But I’m learning what it’s like to love like one because I know the love of my Heavenly Father....and because I get motherly moments. For those, I am grateful.

There are many women in my life who have shown me the good, the bad, the blessing, and the stress of being a mom. I’m thankful for their example and I hope that someday I’m able to be just like them.

I think of Valerie, Annette, Jane, Kim, Katy, Andrea, Tabby, Ginger, Cathy, and Tammy, who I’ve seen be great mothers. I’ve also seen them as strong women who love God and are seeking to figure out how to do life, be mothers and wives, have hobbies and still manage to get their hair to look perfect.

A few words that describe these women:

Valerie- loving and hospitable

Annette- passionate and servant heart

Jane- strong and focused

Kim- caring and funny

Katy- smart and can laugh at herself (and children)

Andrea- determined and hopeful

Tabby- others-focused

Ginger- true to her word and a great listener

Cathy- open home and open heart

Tammy- ministry focused and family focused

***P.S. There are MANY other women I can think of for sure! I'm so thankful that there are so many women to celebrate!!

So, today I celebrate moms. I am thankful for my mom and for all the women in my life who have shown me how to be a mom, wife, and someone who seeks God.

Thank you!

Celebrating You: Wade

My friend Wade...and a new blog series.

While talking to some friends about my blog, my friend Wade said he was sad that he had never made it into my writings. I made sure he knew it wasn’t because he isn’t an important part of my life but mostly my blogs are about things about faith, music, and me. But yes, it’s quite selfish really when I think about the people who are aren’t in my blog. There are so many people in my life to be celebrated..so it got me thinking. Perhaps this should be the start of my new blog series??

**Disclaimer... I have lots of people to celebrate. If I don't write about you, please don't be sad.. I still love you.

So, here’s the start of my series entitled “Celebrating You.”

So today I will write about my friend Wade.

Funny. Friend. Fabulous. Listener. Open.

These words define my friend Wade. Everyone should meet him. He was one of the first people I met when I decided to join a young adults small group several years ago. It’s hard to figure out how many years I’ve known Wade, it feels like he’s always been a part of my life. I guess that’s what friends do. They help you forget what life was like without them, and make sure to remind you that you don’t want life to ever be without them in the future.

I know that no matter where life takes us, Wade and I will always be friends. We’ll always talk on the phone. I learned a few weeks ago that Wade hates talking to the phone, unless it’s me. So I guess we are good “lets catch up on the phone” friends. Wade was tricked into being one of my high school volunteers at our church. I begged him, or at least asked him to pray about it. And he jumped on board soon afterwards. He knows that Sunday nights are focused around the students and so he and I don’t get much time to catch up. Generally, on the drive home, he’ll call and say “Sooooo.” I like that Wade asks me about life. That he genuinely wants to know what is going on, what’s the new scoop, or what drama I’ve gotten myself into.

Here’s a quirky thing about Wade. After going to see a movie, he will write down who he was with on the back of the ticket stub. And then he laminates it and puts it in a binder. So tonight, he and I will go see the new Harry Potter movie and I know that memory will always be in his binder... laminated.

Wade hates concerts. Well, hate isn’t the word. He’s never been to a concert. Until this past Fall when he was forced to go to several. And I secretly think he likes it, but he won’t admit it. But what I have learned from Wade is that he’s willing to try things and I’ve seen this willingness grow in him in the last year or so. I’ve seen him take some new risks, try new things, and that makes me happy. I am learning from him, whether he knows it or not.

Wade has a big heart. He cares deeply for others, and is concerned about how to be a better example and leader to his high school small group guys. He loves his family, cheesy pretzels, and weird TV shows like Survivor and Bones. He has great hobbies and loves to play strategy games. He loves the Lord and is humble. He rarely updates his Facebook status in hopes that when he does, people will see it as a treasure and treat rather than an expectation.

And so what can we learn from Wade...

Ask yourself, what kind of friend am I? Do you ask the question “How are you?” and mean it?

Thanksgiving Loss and Gain.

“Sometimes we’re living in the middle of loss and gain.”

This phrase popped up in my little brain on the way to a camp meeting. And I thought, I wonder what that means, why did this pop in my head, and why did I feel the need to write it down and remember it?

As we began our meeting to plan summer camp, Heather, the co-director started by reading a letter. She informed us that she was leaving camp to be a part of a new career. She spoke of being sad about leaving the camp but excited about where God was taking her in her next journey. She was “living in the middle of loss and gain.” I knew then that the phrase was for her and shared it with her after our meeting. It was as if she knew exactly what I meant.

But yet, aren’t we all living in the middle of loss and gain? Sometimes the loss is big, sometimes small. Sometimes the gain is big and sometimes it’s barely visible.

We can all think of things, even this week, that we could consider a loss or a gain. We can think of tiny tragedies over this past year or decade that come to mind, and we can rejoice in the triumphs of gain we’ve had too. But there are daily losses and gains as well. When I start to compare myself to others, I’m reminded right away of what I’ve gained or lost.

There is a weird connection between loss and gain that reminds me of God’s redemption. Grace is like this, right? I mean, God’s redemption always has a sense of loss and gain. Grace reminds of what we gain. Redemption means loss is happening because there is something to gain. It reminds me that this world is always going to be a loss when we compare it to heaven. There is a lot to gain when we let go of what the world considers loss.

There is much to gain when we stop comparing ourselves to others, to the world, to twitter feeds and blog stats. There’s a lot to gain when we feel the loss of relationships gone wrong, when dreams are not yet fulfilled, or ever get fulfilled. It’s hard to see the gain when we’re living in the middle of loss. But it’s there. Somewhere buried below the pit of loss. If we could just keep digging we’ll find it. It’s there.

It’s hard to think about what we gain from what has been lost. There are times when we don’t have gain from loss, sometimes it’s just loss, loss, loss. I think those moments happen to all of us at some point in our lives. But it’s when we are living in the loss that we MUST search for the gain. I am not in this place right now, but I know a few people who are. Hope comes when we’re able to get up, and find the gain. Whether from searching for a new job, a new counselor, taking yourself on a date and buying a new pair of really expensive shoes, or simply finding a new outlook.

I’m living in the middle of loss and gain. And while neither of which are big, extravagant, or sad things, they are my things. They are my tiny tragedies and triumphs. They are Amber sized losses and Amber sized gains. But the middle is where I want to be. It keeps me grounded, the losses just enough to know that this world is not my home, gains enough to remind me that I’m worth it. The middle is where I find perspective.

I’ve just started to do a study on the book of Isaiah. I’m super excited to read about God’s redemption following these people who lived in the middle of loss and gain, and how at the end of the day “gain” is not of this world, but through redemption and grace.

I think the point is to be sure that whether the scale tips “gain” in our favor, or tips “loss”, we must continue to stand firm in our faith. Isaiah 7:9 reminds us “If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all.” I think that it’s easy to get stuck in the loss or get jaded by the “gain.” May we be people who do not waiver our love for God based on where the scales tip. May we live in the middle of loss and gain in a way that is honoring to God, in a spirit of thanksgiving, in the hope that God is in control..

And so today, Thanksgiving, may we remember the loss and gain of life, to be thankful for the journey that God has us on. To be thankful for the tiny tragedies and the triumphs, for the big gains and even for the large losses.

May we thank God and beg Him to keep us in the middle.

November via Pictures: So blessed!

While waiting for a friend, I flipped through my pictures on my iPhone. I realized that November has given me some great experiences and I was grateful to have pictures to remind me. I've been to a ridiculous number of shows this month. So, here's the first half of November via pictures from my iphone...

November 5th: Downtown Chicago from our my room:

November 6th: Girls at the Hot Chocolate 5k! We won!

November 7th: Chasen/Luminate rock out at The Underground:

November 7th: Anytime Chasen plays, they break something. Bass was so loud, the cups broke!

November 7th: Sam from Luminate signs the bathroom wall:

November 8th: Staff meetings require 2 Diet Cokes:

November 8th: My "big sister" Tabby. Someday I'm gonna be just like her.

November 8th: Chasen House show:

November 9th: My friend Mary with her "peanut" and my "pretzel."

November 10th: Wednesday Night worship with Starfield:

November 11th: Christmas begins in The Underground. UGH. Love/Hate relationship.

November 11th: Skillet/TobyMac show in Springfield. John shot pyro out of his guitar.

November 12th: Robbie Seay and the Youth Team. He promised to come back to The Underground! Win.

November 12th: Donald Miller.

November 13-18th: Nothing apparently happened. I have no pics, except for this one. Funny!

November 18th: Needtobreathe at The Ryman in Nashville.

November 19th: Group Magazine's current issue has my little sidebar article! All the YS convention attendee's get the mag for free today! Yay!

A Million Canaries

Luke 12:6 (The Message)
"What's the price of two or three pet canaries? Some loose change, right? But God never overlooks a single one. And he pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail—even numbering the hairs on your head! So don't be intimidated by all this bully talk. You're worth more than a million canaries.

You’re worth in the eyes of God: more than a million canaries.

It seems vast and unending when you think of a million. It makes me feel that the worth is large. The NIV version of Luke 12:6 says that we are worth more than many sparrows. But really, what is “many”? More than some, less than all? I am not aware... but then again why am I trying to measure the worth?

The point exists that we are worth “alot” in the eyes of Christ. So much so that he knows the number of hairs on our head. In a typical day, I lose hair while I’m blowdrying/straightening it... or from stress. It seems God is intimate and paying attention. God even knows how many hairs are actually grey and not artificially colored.

I was thinking about worth the other day and wrote down a thought...

Our worth is defined by our response to God’s love for us.

When we realize the worth that we are in the eyes of God, we’re able to live from that, to really give back in worship to Him with our lives the way He intended. Our worth is not determined by the temporary worldly things... yet we let it, don’t we?

Our worth should not be determined by what others think of us or by the attention we want or by whether or not we get a call or an email, or recognition. It shouldn’t be determined by the hurtful words of others, by our successes or our failures.

We get disappointed, wallow in self pity, become bitter, and angry when we put our worth in something other than God. When we wallow in self pity it’s because we’ve put our worth in something other than God’s love.

Honestly. If you think about it, every time you’ve had some self pity, it’s because you weren’t counted worthy for whatever upsets you. While there are very obvious offenses and hurt in our lives, and I’m not discounting those feelings, but I wonder at what level do we let those things determine our worth?

In the past few months I’ve been forced to see worth in a new way. Experiences, conversations, and people have put a new perspective in my life. It’s an ongoing process to finding worth in the eyes of the One who matters. Everyday my canary worth is more and more recognized. There is nothing we can do to make us more worthy or less worthy. That’s the beauty of grace. We’re ALWAYS worth more than a million canaries. But it’s a recognition of that worth that helps us know God’s love and grace more and more. It’s in the tough time that we think we can count how many canaries we’re worth yet it’s important that we remember that it’s more than we can count.

We are worth more than a million canaries... do we live this way? Or do we seek worth in our worldly things only to come up short when we put our heads on our pillows at the end of the day?

Our worth is defined by God. THE END. How would our lives be different if we lived this way? What passions and pursuits would shift if we sought after things that were more than define us and our worth?

How would we treat others differently knowing that God counts them worthy too?

How do we love others better? We see them as people who were chosen and created by God. We are no different than our neighbor and if we were to really see that, then things would be much different. If we were just able to see people as God sees them, then we would know they are worthy of love simply because God counts them worthy.

Would we let go of things we really don’t need, get rid of hatred, bitterness, chips on our shoulders because we realized worth comes not from other people, not from things of the land, but from the love of the Lord?

But what do we do? We don’t sit on an island all by ourselves and simply soak in the worth of the Lord’s love. We create worship to our God and live within our worth when we are in community. When we know who defines us and our worth then we can really love, live, and create.

Where’s the balance between doing and being? How do we “do life” yet still live in the “being made worthy by God’s love alone?”

I think it matters at the end of the day when we lay our heads on our pillows, it’s that short few minutes before we start dreaming that is the most alone we will feel, whether we’re in the arms of someone or not. It’s because there is silence. and for a moment we are able to hear God and he says “What was today like? How did you live today knowing your worth comes from Me? Do you know you’re worth more than a million canaries to Me?”

So today I need to count the canaries. And later I’ll try to remember that others are worth more than a million canaries too.

But right now, I’m counting.

Job 28:13
No mortal comprehends its worth; it cannot be found in the land of the living.

Jonah 2:8
Those who cling to worthless idols turn away from God’s love for them.

Hebrews 11:1
The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd.

Colossians 1:10
So that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way.